What I Did With My Sunday Afternoon

Did you see the Channel 6 news last night or this morning? If so, you may have caught a glimpse of a hot looking dude in uniform saving lives. Okay, so there were a few people in uniform. But really, I had on shades. That automatically makes me the hottest. I can't get a screen capture of the part of the video that shows me best, but you can see the video here and try to spot me.

Some stills they had available online:

The Scene:



The back of my head as I get ready to climb the ladder. (Also pictured is my partner, Dan McCracken. Blah, blah, blah.):



My co-worker, Mike Porter, hogging the spotlight:



A wider angle:



Finally on the ground and getting ready to go:



Oh, and the kid who fell was fine. Blah, blah, blah. I was on the news.

Correction

I'm wrong and everyone else is right. It's probably easier that way.

George, George, George

Oh, dear father. Just as I expected that you would comment on that post from Melissa, so you must expect that I will return the volley. (Even though it's more likely an issue that we should just agree to disagree on.)

For those who didn't see the referred to comment as yet:

Well, seeing how you're expecting it...
As for the scotch, a little leads to a lot. I can get you a cushy assignment on the Blue Route Crew when Uncle Walter picks you up some night.
And the pipes? Pink lungs are a terrible thing to waste.
Have a great day!

Posted by Dad who you didn't learn that from.

First things first, a little does not always lead to a lot. Some men abuse women, but that doesn't mean that we all will and should consequently swear them off all together. Some men work too much, but that doesn't mean that we should all remain unemployed. There must be some allowance for personal discretion, self-control and peer accountability.


So far as the community service remark, I think we're safe there for two specific reasons:

a) 1/8th of a glass of Scotch consumed over the course of a couple hours would probably register on a breathalyzer in much the same way that a mouthful of Listerine would.

b) I've, luckily, not yet run into a DUI checkpoint walking down the stairs from the attic to the kitchen. (Come on, do I seem either social enough to go out drinking or stupid enough to drive after doing so?)


And lastly, yes, I do agree that pink lungs are a terrible thing to waste. That's why it's a good thing that both cigar and pipe smoke are intended to be savored in the mouth, not inhaled into the lungs. The point (for me) is the taste, not the nicotine rush that most cigarette smokers tend to seek. Inhaling the smoke causes a more thorough and expedient absorption of nicotine into the blood stream via the exchange of gases in the alveoli. I don't even drink caffeine but 2 or 3 times in any given month because it makes me jittery, and the same goes for nicotine. If I smoked every day I would never get any sleep. Which is just one of the reasons why I basically only smoke a pipe or cigar a few times a month, mostly when hanging out with other boys.

Again, as I began, arguing about these topics isn't likely to achieve anything, since we both believe ourselves to be right. Paul wrote something about this in Romans (Chapter 14, vss 5-7):

One man considers one day more sacred than another; another man considers every day alike. Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind. He who regards one day as special, does so to the Lord. He who eats meat, eats to the Lord, for he gives thanks to God; and he who abstains, does so to the Lord and gives thanks to God. For none of us lives to himself alone and none of us dies to himself alone.

This concludes my contentiousness for today.

Posted by the son who occasionally has a drink or smokes a pipe and yet is still going to heaven. (Okay, so I guess I wasn't completely done yet. But I am now. Honest.)

Pipes and Guns

This past Thursday my sister Melody and her friend Robin came over for dinner. It was a fun evening of making quesadillas, looking through wedding photos, and chatting. But then the real fun began when Timmy, Melody, and Robin headed upstairs to his clubhouse.



When Melody learned that Timmy enjoyed smoking pipes, she wanted him to give her a lesson. Timmy was more than happy to share the art of pipes especially since he had the perfect pipe just for her. Robin and I just sat back and watched the two of them bond over pipes and scotch.



Well, we were all hanging out in Timmy's clubhouse, so the fun continued when Melody noticed Timmy's airsoft gun. She instantly felt the Charlie's Angels in her swell up.



She felt powerful...



and well, we felt fear.



Then she discovered the face mask and the really big gun.



"Don't mess with me."


Good times.

In case you were curious...

As reported on CNN.com,

Top 10 driving pet peeves

1. Distracted drivers talking on cell phones (28.5 percent)
2. Slow drivers in the fast lane (21.6 percent)
3. Pushy drivers who tailgate (18.1 percent)
4. Drivers who weave through traffic to gain one or two car lengths (12.5 percent)
5. Obnoxious drivers who speed up to keep you from changing lanes (5.5 percent)
6. Hasty drivers who change lanes without signaling (4.9 percent)
7. Road Rage (2.7 percent)
8. Motorcyclists who race down the middle of a lane, between cars (2.1 percent)
9. Women applying makeup and men shaving (1.7 percent)
10. Drivers who leave their turn signal on for miles (0.92 percent)

Source: Hagerty Insurance

Sigh

It would be awesome to be able to just laugh at this, but man, part of me wants to cry too.

It's Official!!

Today, I got a letter from the Social Security office that I should be receiving my new social security card in about two weeks. And the letter was addressed to Melissa Kaiser - that makes me official - woo hoo!! Just to clarify, I wasn't hesitating about the name change; I have always looked forward to changing my name when I got married. I love the thought of fully embracing my husband and becoming completely his, even in name. But I was just being lazy because I can be really lazy sometimes.

In similar news, Timmy got a summons for jury duty. Those were the only two pieces of mail we got today and they were both exciting.

A Study In Depravity

Of all the things I thought I might do at work today, studying Calvinism wasn't really something that came to mind. Yet, remarkably, there I was sitting in the parking lot of the Commerce Bank in Aston contemplating the total depravity of man.

We were at the bank (which is located next door to the Aston Police Station) so my partner, Dan, could deposit his paycheck. He'd gone inside to take care of his business while I waited in the ambulance. Out of the bank came a younger looking fellow who got into the Jeep Cherokee parked next to me. It was one of the ones that has gold trim, lettering and such that I always find just a little bit pretentious. As he was backing out of the parking spot I caught view of the front end of his vehicle: it was dented, there was just one "flood light" remaining and I couldn't help but mutter, "Oh yes, very gangsta," under my breath. (No, my pseudo racism was not the study in depravity... this time.) Suddenly, the back tires of his vehicle jumped the curb behind him and he slammed on the brakes. The "Oh, nuts" look on his face was priceless, yet also somewhat confusing. It seemed to show something more than, "I hit a curb." He pulled forward, back into the parking spot and I saw why - he'd backed up onto the curb and into the sign for the drivethrough teller:



Oops.

Now, mind you, this wasn't a love tap. The sign is planted (and wired) into the ground and was thoroughly knocked askew. At any rate, the young man got out and went around the back to inspect his bumper. It must not have been the worse for wear, because he quickly turned his attention to the sign he'd hit. He walked over and tried pushing it back into place, but to no avail.

It was around this time that Dan came walking out of the bank and got back into the ambulance. "What's that all about?" he asked. So I gave him the lowdown and told him that now I was just waiting to see what the kid was going to do - go into the bank and tell them, or get back into his car and drive away. I could tell he was wrestling with the decision in his head already, but then he looked up and saw that I'd been sitting there the whole time and his dilemna really set in. He walked back over and sat down in his Jeep while I waited with baited breath & a notepad in hand to take down his license plate if he tried to drive away. And so we both waited.

About five minutes passed and there was no movement. The cynic in me assumes he was waiting for us to leave, but I suppose he was maybe on the phone consulting his parents and/or insurance provider. The impass continued, however, and so finally Dan said, "This is boring. Why don't we just call the police station and tell them about it?" This option seemed much less exciting, but as I was due to be done work for the day in a little under half an hour, I agreed that this was the most viable option.

We called over to the station and an officer came across the driveway to help the young man "make the right choice". And so, instead of just an insurance claim he also got a citation.

A lesson in Calvinism? Maybe that's a bit of a stretch. But the whole episode really did cause me to ponder how self serving we all are, when you get down to the nitty gritty. There but for the grace of God go I.

Mobilize!

Received this little group message on the Myspace:

On May 15th all myspace members should not go to the gas station in protest high gas prices. Gas is now over $3.00 a gallon in most places. There are 72,110,073 members currently on the network, and the average car takes about 20 to 30 dollars to fill up. If all myspace members did not go to the pump on the 15th it would take $2,163,302,190.00 out of the oil companys pockets for just one day, so please do not go to the gas station on May 15th and lets try to put a dent in the oil industry for at least one day.

Needless to say, I've been inspired by this genius. Remember in The Day After Tomorrow: Dennis Quaid presents his theory about the melting of the polar ice caps causing a massive desalination of the Atlantic Ocean, thus disrupting the North Atlantic current and eventually causing a new ice age? Well, I'm obviously opposed to this process. So, as a means of protest, I think that on May 15th (since we will all have some free time, due to the lack of gas pumping) everyone in America should go piss in the ocean. This will doubtlessly increase the salt level to a safe level for at least one day. Let's get together on this one, people!

Wascally Wabbits

So my adventure today took me to the butcher.

Melissa had found a recipe in one of her books for "Beer Braised Rabbit". She was joking when she mentioned it, but I found it intriguing. I figured they probably wouldn't have rabbit at the Acme, so I called Roy Tweedy's butcher shop. The guy I talked to confirmed that, yes, they had frozen rabbits. Awesome?

I drove over to the shop and found the rabbits in the freezer case. Yep, they were whole rabbits. De-skinned, but whole. Interesting. I asked one of the guys, just to make sure. Yep. Heads and all, he said. And each rabbit would probably be about enough for one person. They were only $2.99 each, so price was not necessarily prohibitive. I think the part that held me back most what the thought of seeing the little buck teeth staring at me from the oven. Indeed.

In the end, there will be no beer braised rabbit served at Chez' Kaiser tomorrow. Maybe some day, but not tomorrow. Chicken will have to do.

Tennis Day 1

Yesterday, Timmy and I went out and played some tennis. Actually, it was more like we tried to play some tennis, but don't we look hot in our athletic wear! You can see the muscle in Timmy's arm. That's my man; he so fine :)



Yesterday, I was having lots of fun with my new racket. Today, I'm not so happy. I woke up in the middle of the night all sore. Ugh. I'm a big wuss. Timmy says that people are sore everyday and find a way to live and I need to cowboy up :(



Uh-oh. Timmy just came out of the bathroom. He had two ibuprofen in his hand and said "these would work better if you took them." Oops. I forgot to take my ibuprofen this morning. I took them out of the bottle and set them aside while I brushed my teeth. Maybe that's why I'm still hurting and I'm having a hard time cowboying up.



Well, I need to get dressed. We're having guests over for dinner tomorrow and need to go to the grocery store today. I don't want to spoil the surprise yet, but I will say that Timmy is currently visiting our local butcher. Pictures to come :)

Biker Chick

I saw this hot girl while I was down at Tinicum riding my bike this afternoon, so I took some pictures of her.

Missing Mimi

Watching Rent. It's actually the first time I've seen it since Timmy bought it for several weeks ago. I love Mimi Marquez. I've loved her since the first time I saw the show. I was worried when I read they would be casting someone new to play Mimi for the movie. It made sense; no way Daphne Ruben-Vega could do it. Rosario Dawson - I'm not sure I could have asked for a better Mimi.

But tonight my heart hurts a little. I love Mimi. I'm drawn to her. She is vibrant and beautiful. She is filled with passion. She lives every moment with no thought of tomorrow. She is reckless. No concern for consequences. There's "no day but today." It's appealing, but it's also infuriating. Mimi almost kills herself with her lifestyle. In fact, in La Boheme, which is the inspiration for Rent, Mimi actually dies. Her life is dangerous, really dangerous.

A very special friend reminds me of her. I can't help but see her throughout this movie. She's the embodiment of Mimi Marquez. I never knew someone so full of life and yet so empty. Can't really have both, can you. I miss her. It's been over a year and I miss her. I miss her smile and her laughter. I miss her hugs. I could go to her and she would just hug me while I cried. No questions asked, she just hugged me and loved me. She made me feel so loved, unconditionally, no strings attached. A found a Valentine's day card she gave me a few years back, and I think it may be the most perfect, beautiful, and touching card I ever received. I never had to explain myself to her; she just accepted me for me. And I had to walk away from her. That was the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, and even though, I understand why and I am grateful for all that has happened since, my heart still hurts. I miss her. I wonder what's going on in her life. I wonder if she hates me, if I became like all those other Christians that hurt her. I really miss her and, yet, I understand why things happen the way they did. I suppose I will mourn her for a long time. I would hope that she knows that I never stopped loving her. That I think of her still and pray for her still. And that she will always live in a special place in my heart.

North Penn Class of 1998

I finally got around to calling up that 800 number I got in the mail several weeks ago. Actually, several weeks ago, I got a final notice. My alma mater is updating and republishing their alumni directory. There was one a few years back. I didn't know about it until one of brothers brought it over to a get together - 5 Rolon siblings are North Penn grads. Funny because I think they might have graduated before I was born - or at least one of them : ) Well, anyway, so I called the 800 number to give them my updated information: name, address, email. All was well and good; in fact, the girl on the other end who I could tell was very young, congratulated me on my recent marriage when she asked if my name had changed. (technically, still working on that name change thing but in my heart, I am Melissa Kaiser). Towards the end of the conversation, she said "well Ms. Kaiser" and I started giggling. It was first time I heard that from someone who wasn't a friend or family member. So, I had to tell her why I was laughing. She laughed but it was one of those awkward, "that's weird" laugh and she replied "so long as it makes happy." Yes, indeed it does.

Of course, she wanted to put me down as reserving an advanced copy. I could only assume it would be slightly pricey so I told her I would have to talk to my brothers and sister to see if one of them were getting one. That wasn't a true statement because I don't really want one. If I happen to see one, I'll look through it but I don't really care to get in touch with anyone. (One exception but I have her number). But she kept pressing me and I asked how much - "two payments of 39.95" I'll refrain from writing what I thought in my head. 80 bucks for an alumni directory - yeah, right. True, this book will be big and it was the alumni verson (hard back) vs the regular version (paper back and $10 less). $80 for an alumni book. Wow. I can only hope the money raised will go to something good and not to some lame prom-like class reunion. Either way, it won't my money.

Hole in the Sky

Heading home from work this morning, the sky was pretty much completely overcast with rather persistent rain. As I waited for the light at Rts. 291 & 420, though, I noticed this one opening in the otherwise grey sky. You can't really see it very well in this picture, but it was a blue patch and you could see the sun shining through it. It was really cool looking. Just so you know.

Dog Fight

I was getting out of the shower yesterday, in preparation for my shift at 7pm, and heard what I would only later realize the awesomicity of: my neighbor getting into a war of words with a chihuahua. That's right. I guess he was in the yard just below our bathroom window doing... Lord knows what when the foul beast (the chihuahua that lives across the alleyway) descended upon him. I will now attempt to recreate the exchange of words that occured, sensored of course - for our more innocent readers. Enjoy.

Chihuahua: Yip yip yip yip yip!
WT: Hey! Who the (heck) are you?
Chihuahua: Yip yip yip yip yip!
WT: This is my yard! You get out of here!
(WT then stomps his foot loudly on the sidewalk a few times. The Chihuahua, I can only assume, retreated to his usual haunt - a lawnchair on the back porch of his house.)
WT: That's right you little (bugger)! Come into my yard and bark at me!
(The Chihuahua, being the bigger man, did not return this verbal volley.)
WT: Did you see that? That little (fudger) came right up on my ankle! (I assume he was talking to one of his people inside the house at that point. I hope he was, anyway.)
WT: Yeah! Right up on my ankle!
WT: (Now addressing the Chihuahua again) Let's see you come back over here now, I've got a stick!
(The Chihuahua opted to not meet this challenge and instead looked quizzically from his lawn chair perch.)
WT: Yeah. That's what I thought!
-Curtain-

I must tell you, it was perhaps the most glorious battle I've ever borne witness to between a man and a dog the size of a large squirrel. One can only hope that the Great Dane who lives next door to the Chihuahua will some day visit out yard. I can only imagine there will be artillery involved. (Hopefully on the Great Dane's part.)

Decorating Tips

Decorating Tip #1 - Nothing says "class" like a marble elephant with a potted plant on it's back.

For Whom the Bell Tolls

We arrived home from an outing to the laundromat to find what, in my mind, can only be described as a pyre in the middle of our back yard. I eagerly kept looking out the bedroom window throughout the evening, hoping to find that it would be lit so I could call 9-1-1 and be a contentious jerk. But, alas, the funeral rite or other similar event did not take place last night. But hey, tonight's Friday night, so hopes remain high that I may yet be able to do my "civic duty".

Decorating the Clubhouse

I awoke this morning to find that the postman had brought me the Jagermeister banner I'd secured from eBay.

Whatever plans I'd had for the day would have to wait, I had to hang the banner.

Hanging an 8 foot by 5 foot banner takes a few minutes.

Das looks wunderbar, now to find a place to hang my German Imperial flag.

Hmmm. Behind the futon looks pretty good, but Le Chat is already hanging there.

I guess I'll just have to move Le Chat.

Here's a nice new home for him.

Now to hang the flag. I once again brandish the mighty PowerShot staple gun.

Do I look all imperial and such, sitting next to the official war flag of the Kaiser?

Speaking of war, I had to relocate my grandfather's sweet coat of arms thingy to a spot next to the flag - it only seemed fitting.

And somewhat less fitting, but still in need of homes, I hung the old bathroom decorations from our Ridley apartment on the other side.

That leaves only one wall with no decoration. But that will have to wait for another day.

Yep. That's how exciting my day was. Glorious.

Woohoo

So the NHL regular season schedule came to a close on Tuesday night, and I must give a big sloppy kiss to Moose Factory, Ontario native Jonathan Cheechoo. He scored a career high 56 goals this season, which was the most goals scored by any player in the league this season. But most especially, it was 2 goals more than the New York Rangers' Jaromir Jagr, who may consistently be voted as the player I'd most like to see checked face first into the dasher. And plus, I mean c'mon, who's not going to love a guy from a place called Moose Factory? That's what I'm talking about.

blah blah blah

I don't feel like working today. I haven't felt like working all week. Clarification: yes, I am unemployed. I meant I don't feel like working on my lesson for tonight. Some weeks I'm more motivated. This week, not so much. Sorry kinship friends.

Timmy called this morning at seven saying he was offered to stay for a double shift and then he would have off tonight. That was fine since I was going to be "working" on my lesson. But I couldn't fall back asleep. So, I got out of bed, ate some Frosted Flakes and watched a couple episodes of Saved By The Bell. SBTB, the only good thing about being up really early in the morning. Fell asleep on the couch for a couple more hours, woke up to Pauly Shore and In The Army Now. I was tempted to watch but instead I turned to Full House. I know, tough choice. Made a grilled ham, turkey, and cheese sandwich - mmmmm. Spoke to Timmy for a few minutes and then spent two hours watching Celebrity Poker Showdown. Wow, today was a waste. But I did spend an hour on the lesson. Ooooh, and I downloaded Enter The Worship Circle - First Circle. Awesome worship CD. But I haven't listened to it yet because I know it will keep me from working on the lesson. Funny how I have to refrain from "worshipping" to study the bible. My goodness. And I put worshipping in quotations because many would say that I am worshipping the Lord by studying my bible, but you know what I mean. Well, I need to get back to the lesson. Or maybe I will go ahead and listen to the CD. If the lesson is going to be wacky anyway, I might as well have a sweet time with Jesus and let that guide me through the evening. Peace.

Roommate Hang Out

On Friday Rachel and I spent some time together. We had brunch at a tasty cafe a couple of blocks from my apartment. Then we came back to my place, and I showed her the Rent alternate ending. And then we breakdanced. Yes, it's true. For Christmas I bought Timmy a how-to-breakdance dvd. It's awesome, but Timmy had yet to open it. He says that it would be awesome to be able to whip out some breakdancing moves at parties and weddings, but now that he has the chance - nope, no breakdancing. But Rachel and I did :) I can always count on Rachel to dance with me.

The first step to learn when you breakdance is the toprock. It is foundational, and it's the basic move dancers are doing between the more complex moves. But it was still hard.



The Toprock:
Starting position: Feet side by side. Both hands at your side.
1 - Hop in starting position.
2 - Step out with your left foot. Toe tap at 45 degree angle over your right foot. Arms spread out back.
3 - Back to the starting position. Hop.
4 - Step out with your right foot. Toe tap at 45 degree angle over your left foot. Arms spread out back.
1 - Back at starting position. Hop. Repeat.
Sound a little weird? It's hard to explain, and it's pretty hard to do!




Even though we were no where near close to mastering the toprock, we decided to continue with the double disk set, and we spent some time working on spins. Rachel was pretty good.





She did pretty well. I, on the other hand, not so good. I had a hard time getting myself on my arms so I kept falling over. Rachel has much more upper body strength than I do and she is much more coordinated. Also she was barefoot and had a better grip on our hardwood floors.



And even when I didn't have to be spinning around, I still couldn't hold myself up. My attempt at a "freeze."



Even then, we had a good time. We got hot, a little sweaty. So we had some Rita's ice and Turkey Hill ice cream for our cool down. Mmmm - yay. Next time, Babe, we will attempt headspins : )

One Month

Last week, Timmy and I celebrated our first month anniversary - que emocion! In honor of the big marker, we spent a few days at the shore. Actually, Timmy's uncle owns a bed and breakfast in Brigantine, NJ. He was generous enough to let us come and stay there. Here we are in our room, working on that week's lesson.

With Atlantic City just a few minutes from Brigantine, it seemed only right to go track down a poker table and jump start our careers as professional poker players. Unfortunately, the tables looked pretty lame, so we hit the slots to win at least some money. No luck. The slots suck. 11 bucks gone.




Timmy and I didn't like the casinos very much - at all. I'd been a couple of times and I didn't like it then. Not sure why I thought that might change - maybe the poker thing but nope, no fun. So, we had dinner, ate gelatos for dessert, and then checked out V for Vendetta at the IMAX. Side note: I really liked the movie - a lot. I'm still thinking about it and that is quite unusual for me. Check it out.

Next day we avoided the insides of the casinos and took a walk on the boardwalk.





So, we didn't really like the boardwalk either. Gaudy. Busy. Lots of people. Lots of people who kept coming up to us trying to get us to go visit their hotel. But at least there was italian ice and I love water ice!! I shared with Timmy.



So our trip was an experience, just like our honeymoon. You know, whenever I go somewhere with Timmy, it's usually an experience. I like it. And hopefully, at some point during one of our experiences, Timmy will take the perfect picture. The wall above our couch is still bare.

Spring Has Sprung

Spring has sprung and I just finished adjusting the front brake pads on my Hayes disc brakes. Soon, I will take many rides through the Tinicum Wildlife refuge - picking up lots of mud, scrapes & stinging nettles along the way. Ahhh. Glorious.

Happy 9th Anniversary.

Today is my ninth anniversary with Jesus. I can hardly believe it's been almost a decade. It's been a good nine years, real good. I can't imagine my life without Him. I can't imagine how different my life would be. Actually I'm not even sure I would be alive. April 13, 1997. My cousin didn't have the slightest clue what was going on that day he invited me to church. No one could have known. Except God. You are very good me. Better to me than I ever deserved. Better to me than I deserve now. Thank You for nine years of life: for love, for joy, for purpose.

Praise the Lord! For it is good to sing praises to our God; for it is pleasant, and a song of praise is fitting. Ps 147:1

Good times.

Good times last night. We had our first dinner party in our new apartment. Que emocion. It was actually an impromptu dinner. We have been planning to go see Scott's musical over at Swarthmore for a couple of weeks. Marti, Dave, and Kris were hoping to go as well. So, the night before the show we invited them to join us for tacos. That was a good choice for me. My first dinner - that's a lot of pressure. But it was dinner we were planning on eating with or without them, and it was a meal that you can't mess up. It was good. We had a fun.

Afterward, we went to Swarthmore to see Scott's musical. That was also fun. Scott's very good and his character was funny. And just as Timmy promised, he aimed to embarrass Scott after the show. Instead of the traditional flowers, he bought him a stuffed animal: this big fluffy white dog with pink floppy ears, a pink heart shaped nose, and a pink ribbon around his neck with "XOXOXOX" on it. After the show, we waited in the lobby for Scott. When we saw him, I handed the dog to Timmy who ran to him, screaming his name, waving the dog. It was so funny and Scott totally appreciated it. It was a good night.

Letters to Ando

An excerpt from an email I received from my brother this morning:

Oh, and by the way, you can tell Melissa I joined the dark side... I bought a Mac this past weekend.

My reply to him, regarding this matter:

YOU WEAK MINDED FOOL! It all started with the iPod, didn't it? Steve Jobs is infiltrating America. Screw Bill Gates, I think we've found the real antichrist. Who doesn't love a guy that puts queer little white earbuds in everyone's head? Think about it.... think about it.

Yeah, I'm basically a people person - when you get right down to it.

Rent Part 1

Timmy bought me Rent yesterday - yay! Now, I saw the movie last November when it came out in the theaters, and it was quite disappointing. In a way, how could I not be disappointed? I've seen the actual show four times, and for the few months leading to the movie premiere, I followed the status of the movie almost every day. Disappointment could only follow. However, even with the disappointment, I knew I would still buy the movie because I'm a little crazy like that when it comes to Rent. But as I have thought about the movie since November, I have this suspicion that I am going to eventually love the movie. The first time I saw the show I was not overwhelmed by it. It took time.

So, yesterday, we got the movie and today I started checking it out. Unfortuntately, I have to prepare the lesson for group tomorrow and do a bunch of other things before Timmy gets home from work, so I can't actually watch the whole movie. I did check out the deleted scenes, though :) And I have to say I loved the alternate ending! Loved it!!! One of the great Rent show moments is the beginning of the second act when the cast casually walks out onto the stage, stands in that line, and sings Seasons of Love. It's awesome. The first trailer for the movie had the cast doing the same thing and it sent chills down my legs. And one of the most tender moments of the show is during the I'll Cover You Reprise ( which is probably personally my favorite Rent song and thank you Chris Columbus that the movie did not disappoint with that scene). I'll Cover You Reprise includes the cast singing Seasons of Love as back up. In the show, the entire cast is once again standing in that line, however, where Angel stood is left empty because of his death. It's one of those things you can miss if you're not really paying attention, but it touches me everytime - that hole in the line because Angel's not there anymore. But the crowd applauds and people cry when Angel runs out and joins the cast for the last bit of the finale. It's a part of the show that I look forward to each time I watch it. It just fills me up with warmth. But it's something that movie couldn't capture. That was my biggest beef with the movie. There were so many things that it couldn't truly grab because it's a completely different medium. Theater is a just different and Rent is a show that, I believe, works best on stage.

But today, I watched the deleted scenes and there was an alternate ending. And it sent chills up my legs. It brought tears to my eyes. It somehow made the Rent movie experience complete. Columbus decided to open the movie with Seasons of Love - the entire cast on a stage in that line just like the show. That wasn't the original sequence in the show, but I understand why he did it that way. It just made more sense for the movie. But in the alternate ending of the movie, during the finale, Columbus faded out of the apartment and back to that line on that stage. And there was a gap in the line because Angel wasn't there. And they sang No Day but Today. Then Mimi turned her head and smiled as Angel walked past her. And as he passed Collins, they grabbed hands, looked at each other, and smiled. And Angel continued on his way to take his place in that line and he finished that song.

I doubt there is anyone who really cares about all that I have just written. In fact, I'll be surprised if most people actually read the whole entry. I can't imagine anyone except Jeremy would care about this alternate ending and how it made me feel. I don't know what it is about Rent. I don't know why I feel such a connection to the show, but I do. At face value, why would I? I'm not a struggling artist, a bohemian. I'm not gay. I don't have AIDS. I don't know anyone who does. I don't do drugs. I don't know anyone who struggles with drugs. There is nothing about the lifestyles of the characters that I can personally connect with like so many Rentheads. I read it all the time, "I'm gay and Rent helped me not feel alone." "My friend was diagnosed with AIDS, and I didn't know what to do. But Rent gave me hope." "I want to be an artist and my family just doesn't understand." I don't have any of those stories. I'm a "good girl." But still this show - there is something about it.

Where's Timmy?

So according to my father-in-law, I'm quite hung up on Timmy. Apparently, my blogging seeps sappiness. In my defense, I am currently unemployed and don't do much without Timmy. And I should hope that three weeks into my marriage, I am still crazy in love. With that said, where's Timmy? Your dad has heard too much of my mushy rantings. And George, I am going to refrain from commenting on the fact that at this moment I am crying because I just finished watching Fools Rush In and one day I am looking forward to having a family with your son. But I will refrain :)

I'm sick.

I feel like I have been sick for a while. That's because I've been fighting something for a few weeks now. There was one night on our honeymoon, actually early morning, that Timmy had to go out to the store to get me stuff for my throat. Dito, he's so good to me. So, the last two days have been unpleasant: sore throat, aches, pain, sinus congestion. My neck is achy. My ears hurt. So sad. I'm quit pathetic actually, and Timmy makes fun of me.

For the first time ever NyQuil isn't working. NyQuil always works. When I am sick, I live on NyQuil and DayQuil. Last night, I tossed and turned for like 2.5 hours. I also have that restless leg thing, well, I've never been diagnosed but I think I definitely have it. So, I couldn't fall asleep and my leg kept twitching. I went and laid on the couch so Timmy could get some sleep. You know how sad that was. He worked Sat, Sun, and Mon, and I missed him sooooo much. Then the first night he is home again, and I couldn't lay down, much less sleep. It was so sad. We went to the store tonight and got some others meds. Hopefully, this will let me sleep next to my husband tonight since he goes back to work tomorrow and Friday night. Boo.

And speaking of my wonderful husband, despite the fact that he teases me since I sound all funny sick and am just a pathetic sick person, he is also so good to me. He humored the fact that I really wanted some rasperry sorbet after kinship. We went to Wawa, which is where we normally get my sorbet, but nope. So, he offers to try another Wawa. So good to me. Next Wawa, no sorbet. Then we went to Acme, closed. Then to Pathmark and it appeared that there wasn't any there either. But he searched through all the sorbet and found my rasperry sorbet. So good to me. He's going to be great when I'm actually pregnant :)

Erika.

Erika moved back to Columbus today. I got a little choked up when I said goodbye to her in the kitchen last night, but I knew to make it fast or I might get really emotional. And I was fine until Timmy said goodbye to her. I was already outside holding the door open for Timmy to come out. But he leaned over to hug Erika goodbye and she said "you take care of my girl." And I just felt something in my heart.

Over the last 3.5 years, Erika has cared so much for me. She was the one who invited me to come check out her small group. Rachel and I visited and still haven't left. Erika has prayed me and loved me and listened to me go on and on and on. For at least a year, I think, we got together for breakfast every other Friday morning. She would say "so, what's going on?" and I would talk for the next 1.5 hours. And she always seemed genuinely interested in all of it. And I could count on her to pray for me. And she would pray for me on the spot - on the phone, at restaurants, in parking lots, it didn't matter. I once told her I was having the hardest time praying and focusing, so for a few weeks, she called me every morning at 830am so we could pray together. Indeed she is one of my pastors, not officially, but she has been a pastor to me. And that is why it was so important to me that she be a part of our wedding some how. And thinking back on it, I'm so glad her part was to pray for us. How appropriate!

She has taken very good care of me, and last night I felt her let go. And that was sad but it was so good. I know she will always be there. In fact, I know I'll be calling and emailing her especially as I learn to be a wife. But I feel so much stronger and more stable than I ever have, and for those times when I'm not feeling strong or stable, I have Timmy. It was like she passed it onto him. "You take care of my girl."

The Kiss

It's true. I had my first kiss on my wedding day.

I wish I could say that a long time ago God revealed to me that He wanted me to wait to share my first kiss with my husband. No, for years I thought something was wrong with me, that I was some sort of freak. I didn't understand and I cried - a lot. Night after night after night, I cried myself to sleep not understanding what God was doing. Then about a year and a half ago, just a few months before Timmy and I met, God spoke to me. One afternoon while praying and reflecting on sexual purity and sexual sin, God spoke to me. It was as clear as anything. Deep in my heart, it all made sense. I can't just casually kiss anyone. It isn't in my nature to do that. When it happens I need to know this is it, I need to know he is the one. And not like I knew others were the one. No, I need to know because we have discussed it. We have prayed about it. We have discussed it with our friends, our family, our pastors. And it dawned on me, we need to be talking about marriage. We need to be engaged.

But I happened to be reading this book about Christian men and their fight for sexual purity and I really believed God wasn't just saying the kiss would happen when I was engaged but when I was married. I didn't like that - at all. I was tired of waiting. I was ready for my kiss. Man that was hard to hear. I spent a while thinking and praying about it but the truth was there was no real thought or prayer necessary because it instantly made perfect sense. I still didn't want to rush into any definite decision but it was so settled - deep inside of me. And I felt great!! I found such freedom. It was like getting a glimpse into God's plan for me and my husband. I was honored that He should care so much for our marriage that He would protect it so much. I was honored that after years of guarding it Himself, He felt confident enough in me to let me guard it myself. It was a huge responsibility, but I felt up to it. That is until I met a boy.

I was fine with my decision about the kiss. I really believed it was God's doing. I had a male friend say to me "good luck with that" when I told him what was going on. And my response to him was "well, good thing I'm only looking for one." If the guy isn't into it, that very clearly tells me to move on. In fact, it was the night that I told Timmy about the kiss, that I asked God "is this it?" Up to that point I was trying to be really cool and not let myself start thinking too much. But Timmy's response was so amazing that I had to ask God if this was the one He wanted for me. And well, you know the answer to that one :)

It wasn't until a little after our engagement that I really began to struggle with "the kiss." Up to that point, I was fine with waiting, but then, well, I really wanted to kiss Timmy. And I was annoyed and frustrated about it but still completely convicted. And again Timmy was amazing. He embraced my decision and he made it is own. And when I really struggled, he refused to let me give in. I'll never forget the night, with both his hands, he grabbed my lips, looked me straight in the eyes and said "this is important." He was right and God had given me a man that understood. God is so good.

I wish I could say the lack of a kiss made my attempt at sexual purity easier- yeah right - in a way it made it whole lot harder. I am no where near sexual purity. But no matter how I struggled, no matter how Timmy and I struggled, we clung to that kiss and to the promise that it would all be worth it.

And it was. It was so worth it.

Do you know that E-Harmony commercial that says "Imagine a first kiss with the passion of a lifetime behind it"? I got all choked up the first time I saw that commercial after the wedding. That's what I had - a first kiss with all the passion of a lifetime behind it. Since I was a little girl, I have dreamed of that kiss. And for many, many years, I cried out to God not understanding what was going on. But He understood and on March 11, I really understood. Those of you who were there may have noticed that I was pretty calm and in control during the wedding ceremony. That is until I heard those words I have been waiting to hear "Tim, you may now kiss your bride." Over the last several months, that decision, that promise between me and God had developed a real voice and that was voice was Patrick's. I needed to hear Patrick say it and then I would know it was right and that it was completely supported by God. And when Patrick said it, I broke down. 26 years was in that kiss. 16 years of daydreaming and wondering was in that kiss. And even more so, a promise of a lifetime to be shared was in that kiss.

And it was so worth it.

I'm not really sure why I am writing all of this. Probably because I like to talk :)

God is good. He knows what's going on. He knows me better than I know myself. And there is a song that Avalon sings, and in the past I found a lot of hope in that song. And it just came to mind while I was getting ready to close up this entry. Yes, God is good.

The Dreams I Dream for You

Chorus
The dreams I dream for you
Are deeper than the ones you're clinging to
More precious than the finest things you knew
And truer than the treasures you pursue
Let the old dreams die
Like stars that fade from view
Then take the cup I offer
And drink deeply of
The dreams I dream for you

Hi.

Yes we are back, and although spending my honeymoon with the Florida spring breakers was wonderful, I am happy to be back home. I'm really wanting to get back into some sort of routine. I have been out of whack for months. However, I'm not happy that Timmy is back at work - boo. The apartment is still relatively new, so there are creepy noises and stuff. I don't like being here alone at night, and I don't like falling asleep without him. So, I'm up late even though I am tired. Hey, but on the bright side, I'm currently watching the funniest episode of Roseanne ever on Nick at Night.

peace out!

It was a beautiful day in all possible ways. Thank you to everyone involved. This girl couldn't have asked for more - mostly because of the man who said he will be with me forever. Yup, I couldn't ask for more.

All my love
Melissa Kaiser - yay!

Almost There.

For months I begged Patrick to marry Timmy and me sooner than March 11. I cried and cried out of pure frustration. I felt like I had no control over my own life. At times I found myself really angry at Patrick, mostly because I respected him too much to just run off and get married. I want Patrick to marry us, and it was important enough that I was willing to wait no matter how much I hated it and no matter how much I cried.

Well, now I am less than 48 hours from being married. Actually it's more like 36 hours. I can't believe it. It hasn't hit me at all. My greatest dream of the last 16 years is 36 hours from coming true.

I wonder when it will hit me. Tomorrow at the rehearsal. Tomorrow night when I say goodnight to Timmy. Saturday morning as my sister is doing my hair. Saturday afternoon as she zips up my dress. When I'm waiting for the doors to the sanctuary to open. When I first catch eyes with Timmy. When he places another ring on my finger. When I place one on his. When Patrick says "Tim, you may now kiss your bride." When I finally give him my kiss. When I first hear "Ladies and Gentlemen, Tim and Melissa Kaiser." When my sister and I first hug. So many possible moments. I wonder when it will be.

One o'clock in the morning. Tonight some of the ladies came over to our new apartment and we enjoyed my last restful evening as a single lady. Timmy and the boys are doing what Timmy and the boys do - poker, beer, and pipes. As he said earlier tonight, "it's the closest thing to a bachelor party I'm gonna get because it's the closet thing I'll accept." Can I tell you how wonderful it feels to know he isn't out getting drunk and looking for one last fling. He is a good man, and I am a blessed woman. Yay!