Old School

When Timmy and I became engaged, he decided that if he would be occasionally driving my car two things would have to change. First, my car needed EZ-PASS, no more scavenging for coins. Second, my car needed a CD player, no more ancient cassettes. So, my fiance added my car to his EZ-PASS account and he bought me a new stereo. I have been very grateful for both.

However, there are times when I miss my cassettes. I miss the music and the memories they carried. So every now and then, I give in and buy a cd of a cassette I once owned. And it is giving in because I'm cheap and don't want to buy again what I already bought. Last year, I tracked down two cds by a latin worship artist because she sang a few of the songs that I first learned when I became a Christian. When I feel spiritually low, those are some of the songs I want to hear the most. So, I gave in and bought the cds. This weekend I gave in again. I bought Color Me Badd's "Time and Chance". Man, I love that CD. It's my theory no music will sound as good to you as the music you loved when you were a kid. The next on my list is to buy Tevin Campbell's "I'm Ready." Oh man, I love that cd so much too!! I was planning on downloading it the same time as CMB, but I'm having iTunes issues. And yes, when I say "buy a cd," I mean download it from iTunes. Does anyone besides my husband still buy cds? So, yeah, Tevin Campbell is definitely next and I'm sure, at some point, I'll have to get Taylor Dayne's "Tell It To My Heart." I really miss that one too.

I'm Putting My Foot Down...

Below is an open letter to my friends and family. I hope you'll consider joining me:

- - - - -

So here I am doing something I have never done before, but I feel God saying, “give it a try.” Over the last few years, my church Blue Route Vineyard has entered into relationship with Love146, an organization committed to the abolition of child sex slavery and exploitation through prevention and aftercare. It’s an issue that makes us sick to our stomachs and a cause worth supporting. Wouldn’t we do just about anything if it were our daughter or our sister or our niece who was trapped in this devastating and disgusting life?

During the months of May and June, I will join Love146 in their Tread on Trafficking campaign. People from around the country will be putting the miles they run, walk, and swim to work by raising money for Love146 and the people they serve. Some of you might know that last fall, I joined the local YMCA and for the first time in my life, I find myself regularly exercising, mostly on the treadmill and the elliptical. When I heard about this new campaign, I thought, “why not? I’m racking up miles anyway. I might as well ask my friends and family to support me.” The more I thought about it, the more I felt God was encouraging me to give it a try. So here I am asking for your support. Perhaps together we can do a small part in the work to the end sexual slavery.

There are few ways you can support me, Love146, and the children effected:

1: PRAY: if you are praying person, pray that human trafficking ends. Pray there will be a time when Love146 doesn’t have to exist anymore. Pray for the complete restoration of the survivors.

2: RUN: Or walk. Or swim. Consider joining us in making your miles count toward a better life for survivors of child slavery. For more information on how to join, visit my page through the link below and click on “Register.” You can start your own team, join as an individual person, or join a preexisting team. You’re welcome to join Team BRV. Even if you don’t go to BRV, we’d love to have you.

3: GIVE: Sponsor me in my effort to raise $500 for Love146. Or if you want to challenge me, sponsor each of my miles. 50 cents a mile? A dollar a mile? Maybe more? I can tell you now that I run/walk at least five miles a week. That’s 40 miles over the course of this eight-week campaign. But if you’re willing to give per mile, I’m willing to push myself in the gym like never before. To give, visit my page through the link below. To sponsor my miles, call or email me. At the end of June, I’ll let you know how many miles I did and then you can give your gift to Love146.

Thank you for reading this letter and for learning about what I hope to do. If anything, I hope you stopped to consider the terrible reality that child sexual slavery does exist and it needs to end.

Melissa Kaiser



Follow This Link to visit my personal web page and help me in my efforts to support Love 146

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An Anniversary

This past Tuesday, April 13, 2010, I celebrated my 13th anniversary with Jesus. I made a comment on Facebook marking the day. A girlfriend of mine made a comment about how I'm the only person she knows who continually remembers that day. I've been thinking about that statement and my response, "why wouldn't I?" Most people I know would be appalled to have their birthday forgotten or not acknowledged. A wife would be heartbroken if her husband forgot their wedding anniversary or just chose to ignore it. Why wouldn't my day with God be the same? Now I understand some people don't have a clear day like I do. For some people it was a decision that was expected or not very much a surprise. For me, it was single-handedly the most defining moment of my life. I knew it that day and still know it now. So, every year I will mark my special day with Jesus and every year I will remember how God completely changed my life and the path I was walking and every year I will be grateful for his mercy and protection and every year I will humbled that he chose me.


"Lord, you are the kind of king that I will call my own
I love your dominion, your everlasting throne
Lord, you are the kind of king in whom my heart will joy
For my eyes have seen the beauty of my king"

Beauty of my King, Seth Parks

Who Do You Think You Are?

Who Do You Think You Are? is a new tv show. Each episode is a different celebrity and we follow them as they trace back their ancestors. Ancestry.com plays a huge role in bringing the show. I'm pretty sure it can't be a coincidence this is airing while the government is trying to get everyone to fill out their census form. But you know what, I really like this show. It makes me want to know more about my family. It makes me want to document what I do know for the generations that follow.

My family is really...difficult. On my mom's side, I don't know all my aunts and uncles. I don't know all my cousins. There are so many. So many divorces and babies born out of wedlock. Just lots of things that make a Luciano family tree really complicated. The Rolon side is a little cleaner but not my dad's branch. My junior year of college, I took a Christian Marriage and Family class. One of our assignments was to do a family tree. I thought, "you have no clue what you're asking me to do." The assignment ended up being the most memorable of my four years. It was also heartbreaking and infuriating. Growing up, my family just felt...I don't even know how to express my feelings.

Timmy's family, on the other hand, is so normal. Mom and Dad love each other. They've been married for 35 years, I think. They have two kids. Each are happily married. Grandmom lives with mom and dad. Pop-pop works at the family business and lives a few minutes down the road. Pop-pop can share the craziest stories of the Kaiser family. Stories like how his grandfather was one of the men who helped establish Folcroft, the town I currently live in. Pop-pop can drive through town and tell you how it used to be and why it's the way it is now. He can tell you where the Kaiser farm used to be and why that one street is named Kaiser Lane. The Kaisers have deep, deep roots in this community and it's one of the things I love most about being a Kaiser. I feel stable with the Kaisers. I think that's what I don't feel most with the Lucianos and Rolons. I lack feelings of stability and of home and permanence. Don't get me wrong, I love the Lucianos and Rolons, but with both sides I felt a little out of place. I still do, I think.

All this to say, I really like this show and it's making me seriously consider joining Ancestry.com. I would love to make more sense of the Lucianos and Rolons. I'd love to document all that information that we do know about the Kaisers. I want to have it for my children and their children and their children's children. And I'd like to have it for me.

Trust

I'm surrounded by a lot of questions, a lot of pain, a lot of doubt, a lot frustration, a lot of anger, a lot of emotions. Not me in particular, but people I love dearly are experiencing these intense and difficult emotions. We talk and I try to say something that consoles them. But at the end of every conversation, the same thing is said: "we have to trust God." I am thankful that God is so trustworthy. I have almost 13 years of God never failing me to cling to when things get tough. Thankfully, my loved ones going through trials also know God to always be faithful. But it seems the hard part is acknowledging that his faithfulness may not look the way we want to. For instance, my uncle. If he doesn't make it, that doesn't mean that God failed us. God is always faithful, always good, even if it doesn't look that way.

Pizza

A large cheese pizza from Pizza Villa is on its way. If you've never had Pizza Villa in Glenolden, you're missing out. They have the best straight up plain pizza. It's something about the cheese. I can easily eat four slices but at PV, I can only do two. Any more and my stomach can't take it. But it's so good.

Other recommendations:
1. Italian Village in Folcroft has a good sicilian crust and Timmy loves the sausage.
2. Little Anthony's in Media has the best, best, best, sicilian marinara. I'm drooling just thinking about it.
3. If I want thin crust, I'll go to the Dominos chain. I like their thin crust with pepperoni.
4. When I don't care about feeling guilty and I really want a fun side, Pizza Hut with a side of their garlic parmesan wings.

Now, I'm really hungry.

Tio Johnny

My uncle Johnny isn't doing well. He's been fighting colon cancer for a couple of years. He had surgery yesterday and from what I've been able to piece together, it's not looking good. I saw him on Saturday. I'm glad I got to do that. It's been 1.5 years since I last saw him. He looked sick, but his spirits are so high. I don't like this feeling of not knowing, of waiting. I sent out an email to some friends and family asking for prayer and my brother Jimmy sent me a word of encouragement that really spoke to my heart. He said "whatever happens, it will be a miracle." That's so true. If he is healed, that will be a miracle. If he survives and lives with this disease, it will be a miracle. If he doesn't make it but instead stands before the throne of God, that will be the greatest of all miracles. We just celebrated Easter two days ago and today I am so grateful for Jesus' death and resurrection. How different we would all be feeling if there were no hope of resurrection for my uncle.

Thank you, Lord, because we have hope in you and in your resurrection.

The Things I Think Of

I was sitting at church last night. It was our first Easter Saturday service. Our pastor Mark was reading Scripture. And this was my thought: "Jesus was dead. Like dead dead. Like he died on Friday and rose again on Sunday. He was dead for a whole day. So what does that mean about the eternal nature of God?" This is how my brain thinks. It led to a little talk with Matthew, our youth guy, Eastern alum, and VLI student. Then another little talk with Matthew and Mark. Of course, I don't have any answers, just more thoughts.

Grown-ups

I spoke to my sister Melody tonight. We were on the phone for over an hour catching up on life. At the end of the conversation, she said "can you believe the talk we just had?" It was a comment on the topics we discussed and I responded, "we are grown-ups with grown-up lives and grown-up issues." Melody asked, "when did that happen?" :)

Who would have thought…

…that a good workout could leave me feeling hopeful. I ran for eleven minutes on the treadmill. That may not seem like a lot to most but for me, it’s huge. I called Timmy afterward and told him that it actually makes me think that maybe I’m not as out of shape as I feared. Or rather, maybe I can actually get into shape.

I feel as healthy as I ever have. I’m working out 3-4 days a week. I’m drinking more water, which makes me feel so much better. After several failed attempts, I’m actually in a routine of taking a daily multi-vitamin. I learned I’m lactose intolerant, which may not seem like a good thing but it’s nice to know why my stomach was so messed up. The only thing I really need to work on is eating better. I hate greens; I love grease.

But overall, I feel really good and it feels good to feel good. For the first time in my life, I feel like I am allowed to ask my body to do something. “Hey, let’s go for a walk with Jessie and not huff and puff.” “Let’s sprint up the stairs and not want to die.” And my body can actually oblige. When I first started working out, I was listening to the stats of heart disease on the radio and and I didn’t feel guilty because I knew I had started doing something about it. And now I can run on a treadmill. That’s progress and I’m so hopeful.

On a side note:

On my way from the gym, I was stopped at a red light on South Avenue when I heard sirens. I looked around for Timmy because I knew he was working close by. Then I saw him in his Crozer 100D medic car. The lights were flashing and the sirens blaring. He turned onto South Ave and drove past me. And I have to admit: I was turned on. My husband’s hot :)

A New Decade

In January, I turned 30. It's weird to think I'm thirty. I'm an adult, but I don't feel like an adult. Then again, I don't feel like a kid either. I feel like...me. I just feel like I've always felt. From the inside, I feel the same. It's from the outside world that I'm different. When I tell someone that I am thirty, they expect something from me: certain behavior, certain actions. I used to feel that way, but now, not so much. When I think of people older than me, I think they might feel the same way I do. They don't feel old. They don't feel like an adult. They're probably wondering how they ended up with four kids and a mortgage. I have a mortgage and I'm not sure how that happened. And this is the decade for me to have children and I'm kinda wigged out by that. And don't get me wrong, I want it all. I just thought I'd feel different.

No matter what happens though. I'm looking forward to this decade. I'm excited to see all that God does and all that he has for me and Timmy.

Lord, I thank you for my life. You've been so good to me. And I ask for more of you this decade. Because all I could really want for me and my family is more of you.

Attempting to Return

Earlier this year, my brother Tom asked me what happened to the blog. Timmy and I just stopped doing it. I didn't have the energy to write or the inspiration to do so. Before I knew it, it was a year and a half since my last entry. But Tom suggested I start up again. He thinks that Facebook statuses are shallow and he misses the thought behind my entries. I've been thinking about that for the last couple of months and I think I'll like to try again. We'll see how it goes.

An entry from my journal this morning....

Jessie, my crazy, neurotic, absolutely wonderful dog, is being especially needy this morning. I finally put my journal to the side and talked to her, rubbing her belly and giving her kisses. Then I told her, "Why are you so needy? Do you realize that everyday you wake up and someone is there to love you? Everyday someone is here to love you. I'm here. Timmy's here. Or Mary and George are there." And as I continued playing with her and rubbing her, I had a really sad thought: there are children in the world who wake up with no one to love on them. My dog is loved more than some children in the world. Then I thought how Jessie always has food and fresh water. A luxury for so many. And then the crazy thought: Jessie has insurance.

I know you can't quite compare pet insurance to human insurance, but consider the implications: Jessie gets yearly check-ups from a certified, trained doctor. She gets yearly vaccinations. She takes monthly prescriptions to protect her heart and the rest of her body. When Jessie is sick, she goes to the doctor's office. If Jessie is really sick or hurt, she does to the ER. In the past, Jessie has had some intestinal issues, so she was on a daily prescription until that cleared up. For a while, because of her mental issues, she was on psych drugs. Jessie gets better medical treatment than so many in this world, even so many in this country.

I don't feel guilty for how well we treat Jessie. She is a genuine part of our family and I think it is the responsible thing to do to take care of any pet you take into your home. This is the main reason Timmy and I were so thoughtful about getting a pet in the first place. We understood the emotional and financial commitment. This is probably one of the main reasons we don't get Jessie a permanent friend/playmate. But still I have to remind myself what Timmy and Will Ferrell remind me: "She's just an F-ing dog." She is part of God's glorious creation. She is one of God's creations, but she does not bear the image of God himself. There are image bearers in this world who aren't treated as well as my dog.

And yet again, He is so good to me...

I was in an accident on Sunday morning. Ugh. But no worries, no one was hurt and I wasn't at fault :)

I was driving down Baltimore Pike in Media on my way to church. There was a green light at the intersection of Baltimore and Orange. I continued and I saw it out of the corner of my eye. I braced myself, screamed, and CRASH! I sat in my car for a few seconds, breathing heavily. I looked up and confirmed "yes, it was a green light." The guy on Orange ran his red light. I drove the car to the side of the street. The other car parked behind me. Again, I sat there breathing really heavily. I don't think I have ever been so shaken up at an accident. Probably because this is the first time when I saw a car driving toward my driver door - aka , at ME.

I got out of the car. It was one of those feelings where I wasn't sure I could walk just because I was shaking so much. As I stepped out of the car. I saw a cop car and started waving them down. It was actually a park car, but I didn't care. He was able to call a Media police officer. I looked behind me and I was being approached by the passenger of the other car: a pretty woman, around my age, 8 months pregnant and holding a toddler. She asked, "are you okay?" Am I okay? What? "Are you okay?" I pointed to the toddler: "is the baby okay?" I pointed to the belly: "is the baby okay?" Everyone was okay. Just shaken up, just as I was. She told me it was all their fault. That her husband was talking to her. Really, I wasn't angry at all. The driver came out. Again, a young, attractive, and very apologetic man. We started exchanging information. It was so hard for me to write. A police officer joined us and we proceeded with the whole accident report process.

While waiting for the officer to finish his part, my phone rang. It was Rich, my associate pastor. It was now after 9am and church had started. I answered the phone, told him I had been in a little accident, and would be there in a few minutes. I hung up the phone and then began the funny part. The driver says, "I think we're going to the same place." I asked, "Blue Route Vineyard?" He replied, "yes." Funny. I smiled, reached out my hand and said, "Oh. Hi. I'm Melissa." He shook my hand and said "Hi. I'm Joe. My wife Jane. Our daughter Sue." "Oh yes, " I said, "the Smiths." I'm sure you picked up that's not their real names, but as soon as they introduced themselves, I recognized their names. That's part of working for the church. A lot of times, I know the names before I know the people. I can only assume then that they had an odd little moment like "oh no, that's the lady who works at the church!" Well, we finished up what we needed to do with the police and then we headed back to our cars: "see you in a few minutes" I said. And sure enough, we drove the three blocks to the church and joined the service.

Timmy was leading worship that day, so I couldn't just go straight to him when I arrived. That wasn't fun. I really just wanted to run up to him and give him a hug. Or rather, I wanted to run up to him and have him hug me. He came off the stage and I walked toward him, putting my face into his chest. "I was in an accident. It wasn't my fault. Do you want to see the damage?" (Oh insert comment: it was my car, thank God and not Timmy's. The story would be totally different if I were driving Timmy's car.) So, I asked if he wanted to see the damage and we started walking out of the sanctuary. Before we walked out, Joe, the driver, walked over to me. I put my left arm around him and before he said anything, I looked at Timmy, smiled, and said "this is the guy who hit me." Poor Joe. I hope he picked up on my sense of humor. I looked at Joe and asked, "Joe, do you know my husband Tim?" They shook hands and awkwardly laughed.

That's my story. No one was hurt. Both cars will definitely need work. I have an appointment with the adjuster on Wednesday. There was no issue as to what happened, which makes the whole process easier - at least for me. The Smiths seem like a nice family. It's a bummer that's how we should officially meet, but it's all good. Accidents happen. Thankfully no one was hurt and everyone was insured :)

God is so Good to me.

Below is the email I just sent to my VLI classmates. What you need to know in order to appreciate this email is a few bits of information: This week we are taking our final exams. This is the second time that we have used the new online test taking website. Exams opened last Saturday and close today (Friday) at 3pm. This is the email I sent to them.

The subject: God is so good to me!

I just had the worst ten minutes. After not feeling at all prepared for several of the essay questions to our exams, I decided to go ahead and take it. I was hoping that I had enough of the information in my brain and that I could recall it. This is not my normal study method. I like to write out all my essays, so that I have a coherent thought with proper transitions. I went ahead and took the first one: Systematic Theology. Done and I don't think I did bad. Sure not the As of the last few tests but I can take a B. I can even take a C for feeling so unprepared. Then I take the second test. Five minutes into it, Timmy tells me the internet on the other computer isn't working. Oh no. Please Jesus. No. He wants to reboot the router, but I don't want to risk it. I'm already logged in. My timer is going and they won't let me log back in and start over. So, I proceed to take the test, taking deep breaths, focusing on the exam, and releasing little prayers for the internet. The exam is done. I press submit and nothing happens. No!!!!!!! I went into the other room and told Timmy. I'm trying to not panic at least not in front of Timmy. I've been a bit unreasonable and out of sorts the last couple of days. My poor husband as had to deal with it. I go back into the other room to check on the laptop. "Safari can't open the page....because the server is not responding." I want to cry. I take the laptop to Timmy and show him the screen. I copy the error message in preparation to send it to Kyle, Jennifer, and Shelly. I am prepared to pray all night that they somehow got my exam and don't have to retake it. Timmy restarts the computer. Internet is up again. I start typing my email. I need Kyle's email address so I back page my error message and there it was as beautiful as anything I have ever seen - my exam and the submit button. I pressed submit as quickly as possible like I didn't want it to change its mind. And I covered my face with my hands, "please jesus. please jesus. please jesus." And it accepted it. It worked. I ran to Timmy. I sat on his lap and he hugged me, my eyes watering. Then he said, "I'm going to go away for 9 months when you're pregnant because you're going to be a wreck." Smile.

The End.

Every week my church sends out what we call "txt." It's a weekly email with last week's bulletin announcements, prayer slide, group information, and a word from our pastor. This week my crazy dog made the txt, meaning Mark mentioned her in his blurb. I have to share in case you aren't on the list...

Luke 10:5-12 (TNIV)
“When you enter a house, first say, ‘Peace to this house.’ If the head of the house loves peace, your peace will rest on that house; if not, it will return to you. Stay there, eating and drinking whatever they give you, for workers deserve their wages. Do not move around from house to house.
“When you enter a town and are welcomed, eat what is set before you. Heal the sick who are there and tell them, ‘The kingdom of God has come near to you.’ But when you enter a town and are not welcomed, go into its streets and say, ‘Even the dust of your town we wipe from our feet as a warning to you. Yet be sure of this: The kingdom of God has come near.’ I tell you, it will be more bearable on that day for Sodom than for that town.

…

I share an office with a dog named Jessie. She belongs to Melissa, my assistant, and she makes coming to the office pretty cool. One of Jessie’s best skills is letting me know that she’s very glad to see me. The tail wags the dog, as the saying goes.

But Jessie doesn’t welcome everybody. Far from it. Perhaps she’s an introvert or not a people person. Maybe a snob. But for whatever reason, Jessie is sort of scary and vehement about letting some people know she isn’t thrilled when they arrive. She gets over it, but more than one person has jumped back at her bark.

When Jesus sent his disciples out with the news of his Kingdom, he warned them that they would get one of two reactions; they would find people who love peace and host them heartily, and they would find people, whole towns even, who would bark their lack of welcome from the moment their boundaries were crossed.

Which are you? Vicious whenever the reign of God gets real or real close? Or are you a tail wagging pup, enthusiastically welcoming God and his good news whenever they draw near?

I believe it will be great for my house when Jesus comes near. And sad beyond words if he comes near only to find me scared and growling, doing my best to ward him off like he’s a burgular.

Everyday is a good day to be the Son of man’s best friend. Start wagging your tail, the Kingdom of God has come near.

woof!
m.

when i can't sleep....

I feel it's been a while since I wrote a cheesy "I love Timmy" blog entry and well, I want to write one now.

I'm sitting on the couch in the living room with my laptop. I went to bed at 11:30pm. At 12:30, I gave up trying to fall asleep and left bed. It's now 1:30am and Timmy just came out of the room. He noticed I wasn't in bed and wanted to check up on me. "I'm okay. I just can't sleep." "Okay, just want to make sure you aren't laying on the bathroom floor. I love you." He turns around and heads back to bed.

That little exchange warms my heart. I spent years not being able to sleep and no one knew. I spent years crying myself to sleep and no one really knew. I'd stay up wondering if I would always be alone, if anyone would ever really care. He cares. There is someone in my life, who notices when I can't sleep. It's my favorite part of being married. There is someone with whom to share my life.

There's a movie with a quotation that I just love. It's Shall We Dance: Susan Sarandon, Richard Gere, Jennifer Lopez. Not much to the movie, but there are a few scenes that I love. In one scene, someone asks Susan's character, "why do people get married?" She replied:

we need a witness to our lives. There’s a billion people on the planet, I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you’re promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things... all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness’

Timmy notices when I can't sleep. I love that about him.

this week

I had a rough week this week. It was super stressful. I was trying to study for my two midterms, and I didn't feel prepared for either one. More frustrating was that I didn't feel the material was clearly taught. It put me on edge and then there were some financial questions at the church. Some times at the church, I forget that I don't have a business/accounting/math background. I know the books. I keep good track of them. I can answer questions when their asked. Then there's this week when I ask myself, "how did I end up responsible for the church's finances?" Thankfully, one of my dearest, dearest friends is an accountant and she goes to my church. She sat down with me and tried to help me understand what was going on - let me emphasize the word "tried." Accounting is another language.

At the end of the week, things were good. God graciously guided me through the study process and I think I did well on both tests. By well, I mean I didn't fail like I thought. I don't however, expect the straight A's from last quarter. The financial question is partially answered, partially on hold, but definitely not overwhelming. The last two days have been great. Lots of sleep. Lots of doing nothing. Lots of Olympics. It's been good.

However, something happened yesterday to put a damper on my happiness. I was catching up on dishes last night, when I saw a mouse out of the corner of my eye next to my dishes. I ran out of the kitchen, water still running. I called my husband at work and felt the tears welling up. I know it's irrational. I know that this little gray mouse isn't going to attack me. I know my husband can't do anything while he is on night shift in Chester. I know these things, but it's a fear and some fears are irrational. So, last night I locked myself in my bedroom, and I put a towel against my door for added peace of mind. This afternoon I did my dishes, while my husband was home. I acknowledge that this mouse issue is mostly my issue for being lazy and letting my dishes go. But despite the clean kitchen, I have only been in there once since Timmy left and that was to turn off the light. Now, I am safely tucked away in my bedroom - yes, the towel is still against the door and I am hoping I don't have to go to the bathroom again.

And perhaps you are thinking what my husband suggested - just let Jessie go for it. Do you know how traumatized I would be if I saw my dog with a mouse in its mouth? Each time, she left the living room this evening, I prayed that she wouldn't come back with a mouse in her mouth. I don't know what I would have done. Well, besides cry....

Things that God Reminded Me Today...

1. I can have an ugly temper.
2. My temper doesn't go off for a lot of things but it goes off for the stupidest, smallest, most trivial things.
3. Humility is hard to accept.
4. Admitting your wrong hurts, even when you know no one else cares that you were wrong.
5. Sometimes I take things way too seriously.
6. I should never let anything wrap me up so tight that a kiss from my husband can't help.
7. I should be thankful that I work for a man whose more concerned with how I'm doing than what work I'm doing and that he actually prays for me when I'm having a bad day.
8. I can't always blame these ridiculous intense feelings on hormones.
9. It's okay to cry and it's better to cry than to punch something or yell at someone.
10. Don't worry so much about the grades - I've "already got the goods" (MDT)
11. God's love for me hasn't changed at all today.

I Don't Understand

For Christmas in July this year, Timmy and I have bought a new bed. We currently have a double and it was great except for the past year when a not so little dog joined our family. Now, all three of us sleep together and we need an upgrade. So the queen will be delivered on Friday. Today I went to Kohls to pick up new bed sheets. Ugh. I don't understand bed sheets. I don't understand how I can spend $135 on three sets of sheets and one blanket. I really don't understand how that can be my sale total. We saved $170 going today when Kohls had a 50% off sale and then using Gradnmom's 15% discount. It would have been $300 - on sheets. My goodness.